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  • JoyAmaya

Nostalgia

Updated: Feb 18, 2018



I have been so caught up in nostalgia lately as if I am looking for a way out of reality. I think about the way things used to be, and how they've changed, and how I'd do anything to be back there. 


I reminisce on childhood quite frequently and miss how easy everything was. I miss my innocence and naivety and the constant mystery of outcomes. 


I miss when things were so easy like falling asleep on the couch at night and waking up in your bed in the morning. Mom picking your outfits, doing your hair, and taking you wherever you needed to go. 


I miss friendships that I'd thought I'd have forever. Having so many friends, from so many places I never felt lonely, there was always someone there, somewhere. 

I miss being me. Or who I thought I was and would be. 


Today, I don't reminisce in response to sadness, I reminisce in response to gratefulness. All those memories simply make me grateful for everything I have been blessed with. 


My naivety turned into knowledge, I am wiser and smarter and my decision making skills are crisp no matter the complexity thrown my way. Outcomes are always a mystery that's life. Naivety is cute when your young, it can be fatal as you grow older. 


My dependence turned into independence. I don't live with moms anymore but all that she has taught me has made me ready for the real world and I am so blessed to have my independence, both physically and mentally. To be able to walk myself from my couch to my bed every night is a true blessing. 


My friendships are no longer toxic. They are fresh, deep, and solid. There are people who are more like family than friends these days. Although we're scattered all over the world, we are all just a phone call away. I wouldn't trade my few golds for a thousand silvers, ever. 


I don't miss being me, because I still am me. I have evolved into the beautiful creature I am today and someday will miss the beautiful young creature I am today. The past made me who I am and nostalgia continues to make me grateful for all that has made me who I am.

 

If you feel like you're stuck in your past, it isn't always a bad thing. It's a beautiful thing. The past has so much responsibility for our future. So learn to live and love each day because every single second is responsible for a moment yet to come.

 

Much love and Happy Monday y'all.  Stay Tuned. 

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